Editor’s Note: The opinions expressed in this blog post are solely those of the author.

“Whether we pray or do not pray each new day commences with an act of faith. We turn our faces to a future we have yet to meet. Always believing what we will be—must be…BUT we will not break no matter what we give or lose or must receive. Our yesterdays never return. We must keep looking forward, trusting, letting go. Saying this is the day the Lord has made. We will rejoice and be glad in it, even when it hurts.”

In episode six we saw both Lucille and Cyril face their loss and grief. They both handled it differently and had to find their new sense of balance so that they could move forward. Grief is so individual and you can be out of step with yourself and everyone around you. Your heart, head, and body are just not in sync. I have often thought that grief is like standing there as the world is whirling by – yet you are frozen and feeling small. Everything slows down almost like going into a tunnel. It gets quiet and things stand still for this short period of time.….but then the noise returns and everything is moving too quickly for our reflexes. It is hard to see the world and life moving forward as we are still stuck. You want to scream out—do you not know what just happened!!

When you work day in and day out with life and birth and for the most part joy – it can be VERY difficult when we experience a loss and must continue to actively engage. As well, it is difficult if we witness a colleague struggle with personal issues such as infertility, pregnancy complications, or a loss such as a miscarriage. We still must show up and do the work of midwifery and being with woman. All the while we are surrounded by the whirling pace of life—yet we may be feeling stuck within our own grief. In this episode both Shelagh and Sister Julienne were sensitive and astute as they recognized the personal difficulties for Lucille and the need for added time and space for healing. As well, Sister Monica Joan was supportive of Cyril as she encouraged him to not ignore his own feelings of loss and grief and to share his pain.

In another storyline they spoke of a rodent ulcer. I had never heard the term before and had to look it up. It was another term for Basal Cell Carcinoma! I love that I am always learning things from watching the show.

The storyline of Susan (Suzie)/Clover made me think back on several experiences where hospitals that I have worked at have had a baby with gastroschisis. Gastroschisis occurs in about one out of every 5,000 births. In my career I have worked at very busy high volume and high risk hospitals in major cities (Toronto, Ontario Canada; Chicago, and Detroit) and I have seen this specific birth defect 3 times in my career. This is a birth defect of the abdominal wall where the baby’s intestines are found outside of the body (you can see them as if they are coming out of the belly button). It can be more extensive where other organs are also outside the body. In the episode Shelagh had no clue this would occur with the birth. As a modern day midwife most of our clients opt for an ultrasound or even prenatal screening; therefore, in the situations that I was involved in we were aware this was going to occur and could have an entire team ready to receive the baby for care. The actual repair depends on the extensiveness of the defect. It can be a Primary Gastroschisis Repair which is done when the condition is not as severe and they surgically replace the organs or it can be a Staged Gastroschisis Repair which is done when there is a more serious or extensive case.

I do still remember the “team” being prepared and all hands were on deck to assist. In the delivery room, as soon as the baby was born they wrapped the bowel with sterile saline dressings covered with plastic wrap to preserve heat and minimize insensible fluid loss. The baby was immediately placed into a plastic bag covering its lower half to maximize temperature control and hydration while allowing access to initial visual examination. An orogastric tube was placed to decompress the stomach. Intravenous lines were inserted and they made sure the airway was stabilized. As a midwife we always try to promote quiet and calm; however, in these situations there is activity, lights and tensions can run high.

If you are born in North America the overall survival rate for live-born infants with gastroschisis is high at 97.8 percent. When there was mortality (death) the cases were often complicated by sepsis. When we look at global studies and the lack of access to neonatal surgical units we see diminished outcomes for survival. Survival until hospital discharge was only 10% in low income countries, 68% in middle income countries and 98.6% in high income countries.

Shelagh showed the advantage of having a midwife present with her compassion, skill, calmness, and strength of getting the transport and needed medical care. When we all act together to support women and families varied roles can be filled. The fear can be diminished and the hands that we hold can help steady the shaking fearful heart.

“Pain passes. Better days do come and yet still we long to see what lies ahead. We yearn for our vision to pierce the pain to be able to say there’s nothing to fear and no harm will come to us. But we have no lamp and no spyglass and the road ahead is dark. Have faith in the light and the warmth and the tenderness and nearness of the people you love. This is now. This is today. This cluster of ours, this mettle of joy and imperfection, this is the present and it is all we can be sure of. Embrace it. It is the most precious thing we have.”